Breaking Down

Assalamualaikum w. b. t.. Hello guys :)

The picture above clearly explains everything that I'm feeling. Its the time of the year where I feel like broken into pieces. I am breaking down. The saddest thing is that, I don't know the real reason why. I just feels like I wanna cry. Theres a lot of things filling up my heart these days. It hurts so bad :(

I really really need a shoulder to cry on. Someone that would just hear everything that I said without saying or judging anything. I cant take it :(  I cant help it to not feeling this way. I cant help it but to fall down. To break down. 

Today is the last day of fasting... Tomorrow is Syawal; Hari Raya. It should be a happy day today and tomorrow. But these two days, things are hard for me. I dont understand anything on whats going on. I dont know what I should do. I dont know why I'm still trying to hold on. I'm pitying myself :(  I feel sorry for myself for what I've done :(  I have friends that I can talk to... But I dont want to burden them with what I'm feeling. And I dont feel like telling anyone.

Its my problem anyway... Either its hurting me or not, its my problem. Something that I have to face no matter what, no matter how hard it is, and no matter how hurt it makes me. I have to go through it. :') 

Its not my type typing these kind of things. But this time, I just needed something that can ease me a bit--by writing. Maybe I'm the only one that is over thinking. Girls--its normal to be that way. Its just that, I thought by today, I can forget everything. But no. It just hurts me all over again rereading everything. Its not that I've hurt my pride or anything. Its just that I feel pity towards myself. To thinking and believing that what I'm doing is something that can make it keep going. Something that wouldnt make us bored of each other. But no. Its something that I should stop doing. It has always been me. Maybe thats just how girls are. It hurts. :'(

I really need a shoulder to cry on :'(

Sorry. Bye