The happy and sad day


And hai peeps! So as what the title says "The happy and sad day" Sobs. Memandangkan sudah lama saya menyepi, so let me talk about everything from the beginning. And so.... 3 weeks ago (I guess?) my sister just got married with a nice man that she didn't even know who --My sister is 23 years old. My dad got so worried that my sister is not married yet/not having any choices of future husband. So he ask her if she wants him to find her someone (and ofourse someone that is considered as a nice husband, baik dari segi agama, etc.). So my sister just said "yes" without even expecting anything. I really thought that the process of finding this "calon" is hard. Tapi rupanya ada 4 orang calon. Cuma yang betul-betul datang pegi rumah untuk tengok rupa ni abang ipar saya ja. My sister didnt even know he came to see her face sebab parents kami tipu kami. They said that someone from Korea is coming to our house so we (kami bertiga adik beradik yang suda 18+ years old) feel so excited. Tapi rupanya....calon suami kakak -,- ok fine. Pudar dan musnah harapan. =,=


And so, beberapa hari lepas abang ipar saya datang rumah, ayah asyik tanya kakak "ada dia mesej?" My sister keeps on answering "belum lagi". So after a few days pass, abang ipar saya minta izin ayah saya untuk berkawan dengan kakak saya. & after that, he texted my sister. They dont really text so much as they just getting to know each other. They didnt even talked to the phone. So a few weeks (I guess) passed, then abang ipar saya hantar parents dia p rumah kami. Actually untuk jumpa family, berkenal-kenalan ja. Abang ipar saya tidak ikut sebab dia kerja di Melaka. Niat asal mau jumpa family sahaja, tapi tiba-tiba parents terus cerita pasal tarikh kahwin -,- They choose a date where the kids are having their holidays. Around end of May. Tapi secara draft sahaja dan berjanji untuk meeting kedua.


Few days pass, akhirnya abang ipar saya buat keputusan untuk meminang kakak. Ni sebab kawan-kawan dia syorkan untuk meminang. Bukan nikah terus. So datang la rombongan meminang pada hujung bulan 4 atau bulan 5. Lepas meminang dorang bincang tarikh kahwin. Sebulan selepas tunang: 5 June 2015. Alhamdulillah, Allah permudahkan segala urusan dorang. Walaupun ada masa sebulan ja untuk urus majlis, majlis tetap berjalan lancar. My dad was a bit shock when the day of my sisters marriage is getting near. He said "Tak terlalu laju ka long? Tunggu la lepas raya". But then my sister said nope. Yeah nope. Sebab ayah saya yang risau kakak belum kahwin umur 23 -.- itupun ayah sudah warning kami perempuan awal-awal. Kalau umur 23 tahun belum ada lagi lelaki datang mau nikah, ayah akan carikan calon. Mmm. Okay. Sekali ayah jumpa calon untuk kakak, ayah pulak rasa laju. Luls.


And so, on 05 June 2015 selepas waktu asar, kakak saya sah bergelar isteri kepada abang ipar saya. Hilanglah tanggungjawab ayah terhadap kakak~ sobs. Its a happy but sad day. Macam rasa kehilangan something. Huhuhu. Then esoknya majlis makan beradab. We didnt use pelamin sebab itu hanya adat and its not something good to do. & pelamin bukannya cara islam. The aim of the marriage is to keep it as simple as possible, tanpa apa-apa pembaziran. Alhamdulillah, everything went well as expected. 


It is really a happy day. I am so happy to see my sister is happy. She has been hurt by someone, but then Allah give her an incredible husband, without dating, seeing each other, calling, they just get together. They didnt even had the chance to meet for the second time. The first time they really talked to each other face to face is on their marriage day. Hebat sangat perancangan Allah. HE gives us someone that we need, not someone that we want. Alhamdulillah.


But the sad part is? I lost my sister :'( She move away with her husband at Melaka. I felt so lonely and lost. Its like, a part of me is missing. I keep on searching for her everytime I came home from my class. I keep on thinking about her at home. I miss her. Its really like a dream. I really couldnt believe that my sister is someone else's wife and she's far away from us. I always fight with my sister. We really dont get along that well. But thats how our relationship is. We quarrel, we fight, but deep down, we love each other. Eventhough my sister garang macam singa, but she is caring. Its just that she doesnt shows it that much. Sobs. Rindu. My sister is still our family, tapi tanggungjawab dia sudah lepas. So it means that now, I am the leader of my brother and sisters. Huhuhu. Sedih. Part paling sedih bila nampak something, teringat kakak. Bila beli something then bawa balik rumah, teringat kakak yang selalunya akan tanya "apa tu kamu makan?". Uwaaaa. Rindunya :'(


I'm really happy for her. But I just missed her. I want things to go back the ways it was. But I just cant :'( I'm happy with what she is now. So turning back is really not the biggest thing I wanna do. I just want to spent a lot of time with her. We just didnt get the chance to. Sedih-sedih saya, I know my parents lagi sedih dan rindu kan? Anak dorang jaga dari baby sampai la 23 tahun akhirnya tinggalkan dorang. Ouch. Sakit! & I keep on thinking, do I wanna get married? I dont want to leave my parents. But hmm. A wife must follow their husband. & that is my vow to myself. No matter where my husband goes, I wanna follow him. Sebab, selepas kahwin, syurga seorang isteri adalah bawah tapak kaki suami. Kan?


Dulu saya selalu paksa X kahwin kahwin kahwin hubungan halal yada-yada-yada, like a stupid girl =.= but now I know why kami tidak kahwin. Hahaha. Allah has better plans. Though it really hurts like errr, sebab someone that you thought will be yours forever is not actually yours. Someone that you really like so much and is really serious to is not that serious towards you. Sedih sobs. I got fed up feeling like ****. So I leave. Because I know, its not worthy running to someone that does not has the same feeling as you are. You know how I feel like I wasted all my time and life just to be the best but he....pfft. Tapi Alhamdulillah, that has made me to what I am today. It makes me to think more. To love myself better. To know my worth. To leave when I know its not working out. Alhamdulillah.


Alhamdulillah juga, because of what I have experienced before with that X, it makes me to be more careful in giving my heart away. More careful in saying "I love you". That experience teaches me to be patient. To trust Allah's plan. Eventhough now I have someone in mind, someone that I really do adore, we end up not to put any hopes in what we feel. Because hope hurts. But its okay to let them know you like them. Atleast make them feel worthy. Kay A? :p


Even if I still reminiscence about my past, its not that I missed it. Its just that, it makes me feel much more grateful to what I have today. I am really blessed. Knowing someone that I really didnt even think of getting close with. Fate maybe? :p 



Okay. So dari cerita kahwin kakak pegi cerita saya. Pfft. Meleret jauh. So hmm, to the teenagers out there, ofourse umur-umur 18-21 adalah umur-umur panas, mau kahwin muda and everything. Its just your feeling. Ignore it. You know you will get married when you are ready, not when you want it. A foundation of marriage should be built when you guys are totally ready to build an empire together. If its just based on what you feel, it is not right. Banyak cabaran bila sudah kahwin. Financing and everything. Ofcourse nampak senang. But look at yourself first. Are you ready to live a hard life? Phase pertama perkahwinan adalah phase yang paling banyak dugaan. Dengan teda duit and everything. Are you willing to give up everything that you have now to go throught that situation? I know, cari duit senang. Ada usaha, insyaAllah ada duit. But if you are a big spender type of person, how can you live with just a little money? Think about it. If you think you cant go without not having something new every month, then buang jauh-jauh keinginan mau kahwin tu. Cari duit dulu or improve diri dulu. When you are ready, the time will come.
# An advice yang sangat ditujukan kepada diri sendiri. Muahahaha.


Oh kay tu jew bye. Enjoy pictures di bawah. Lalala. Bye!




Their first ever picture together!
>.< 


So bye. :)